Self-Deception and Denial

intermediate3 min readbusiness · philosophy · psychology

Self-deception and denial are cognitive biases that lead individuals to distort or ignore reality to protect self-interest, maintain comfort, or avoid unpleasant truths, often resulting in wishful thinking and poor decision-making.

THE IDEA

Nothing is easier than self-deceit. For what each man wishes, that he also believes to be true.

Demosthenes (Greek statesman, 384-322 BC)

John couldn't admit to others that he'd made a bad deal. "I was almost right! I lost money, but others lost more. It wasn't my fault. It was out of my control! You win some, you lose some."

We deny and distort reality to feel more comfortable, especially when reality threatens our self-interest. To quote the Austrian psychologist Sigmund Freud: "Illusions commend themselves to us because they save us pain and allow us to enjoy pleasure instead." We view things the way we want to see them. We hear what we want to hear and deny what is inconsistent with our deeply held beliefs. We deny unpleasant news and prefer comfort to truth. We choose the right people to ask. We make sense of bad events by telling ourselves comforting stories that give them meaning.

"I hope the project succeeds in time and on budget."

In relating the events of the 5th Century B.C. war between the main adversaries Athens and Sparta, the Greek historian Thucydides wrote: "... their judgment was based more upon blind wishing than upon any sound prediction; for it is a habit of mankind to entrust to careless hope what they long for, and to use sovereign reason to thrust aside what they do not desire." Wishful thinking is rooted in denial, offering us a more pleasant reality. In business, this is one reason for project delays and cost overruns.

We believe something is true because it sounds believable or we want to believe it, especially with issues of love, health, religion, and death. This is one reason why people follow gurus. They encourage followers to trust their hearts and forget their heads. Philosopher and mathematician Bertrand Russell said in Skeptical Essays: "What is wanted is not the will to believe, but the will to find out, which is the exact opposite."

Keep in mind

In his famous 1974 commencement address at Caltech, American physicist Richard Feynman warned against self-deception: "The first principle is that you must not fool yourself—and you are the easiest person to fool."
Austrian philosopher Ludwig Wittgenstein said in Culture and Value: "Nothing is so difficult as not deceiving oneself." We have to see the world as it is. Not for what it was or for what we want it to be. Refusing to look at unpleasant facts doesn't make them disappear. Bad news that is true is better than good news that is wrong.
Weigh the social, financial, physical and emotional costs of continuing to deny a problem against the costs of acknowledging it and acting.

When to use it

Evaluating a failing project to avoid cost overruns by acknowledging delays early
Recognizing denial in personal relationships when facing a breakup
Assessing health risks when symptoms are present instead of ignoring them
Avoiding wishful thinking in financial investments by relying on data rather than hope

FROM THEORY TO EVERYDAY LIFE

In practice

John's Bad Deal

John made a poor business decision but could not admit it. He rationalized by comparing himself to others who lost more and by claiming factors were out of his control, demonstrating denial of personal responsibility.

Project Hopes

A manager hopes a project will succeed on time and budget despite evidence to the contrary, illustrating wishful thinking that often leads to delays and cost overruns.

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A MOMENT TO REFLECT

Put it to work.

Think of a time you denied a difficult truth. What were the consequences?
How can you protect yourself from self-deception when making important decisions?
In what ways do you use wishful thinking to avoid facing reality?